MYSTERY OF LOVE

MYSTERY OF LOVE

Love is a basic human emotion but something understanding how and why it happens is not necessarily easy. Many people suggest that love is simply something too mysterious and spiritual for scientists to fully understand. However, research by many researchers and psychologists gives ways to describe love and other emotional attachments by use of theories.

 

Liking versus loving: This theory posits that love is made up of three elements i.e. attachment, care, and intimacy. Attachment is needed to receive care, approval, and physical contact with the other person. Caring involves valuing the other person's needs and happiness as much as your own. Intimacy refers to the sharing of thoughts, desires, and feelings with the other person.

 

Compassionate versus passionate love: These are the two types of love. Compassionate love is characterized by mutual respect accompanied by, attachment, affection, and trust. It usually develops out of feelings of mutual understanding and sharing respect for one another. On the other hand, passionate love is characterized by intense emotions, sexual attraction, anxiety, and affection. When these intense emotions are reciprocated, people feel elated and fulfilled. Unreciprocated love leads to feelings of despondence and despair. Passionate love is transitory usually lasting between six and thirty months.

 

Passionate love arises when cultural expectations encourage falling in love when the person needs your preconceived ideas of an ideal love and when you experience heightened physiological arousal in person. Ideally, passionate love leads to compassionate love is far more enduring, while most people desire relationships that combine security and stability of compassion with the intensity of passionate love which is rare.

 

The color wheel model of love: Just as it is in the color wheel where we have three primary colors that are used to form other types of colors. The same applies to love. Three basic styles of love later combine to form nine different secondary love styles. The three primary styles are loving an ideal person, love as a game, and love as friendship. The secondary styles are obsessive love, realistic and practical love, and selfless love.

 

Triangular theory: It suggests that love has three components; intimacy, passion, and commitment. Different components of these three components result in different types of love. For instance, a combination of intimacy and commitment results in compassionate love. On the other hand, a combination of passion and intimacy leads to passionate love.

 

From the analysis, it’s worth realizing that relationships built from a combination of two or more elements are more enduring. This is opposed to those based upon a single component. Choose the love that you want wisely before falling for a phony lover.